COFFY (1973) Review

Directed by: Jack Hill
Written by: Jack Hill
Starring: Pam Grier, Booker Bradshaw, Sid Haig, Robert DoQui, William Elliott, Allan Arbus

"THE BADDEST ONE-CHICK HIT-SQUAD THAT EVER HIT TOWN"

Prepare yourself for one of the greatest examples of blaxploitation cinema ever. This is the movie that kickstarted Pam Grier's career and won over the hearts (and other certain body parts...) of men everywhere, with her combination of sex appeal and take-no-prisoners attitude. And with good reason; COFFY is an incredible and unforgettable piece of exploitation filmmaking with enough sex, violence, nudity and action to please just about anybody. Reminiscent of vigilante movies like DEATHWISH (but actually preceding it) COFFY has Pam Grier hunting down and exacting revenge on the drug-pushing scum of the city after her sister became hooked on The Big H.

A film's opening scene is usually a good indicator of how enjoyable is going to be, and COFFY has a pretty awesome opener.
Acting the part of a strung out junkie, Coffy (Grier) leads a big-time pusher and a not-so-big-time pusher back to an apartment where - as long as they can hook her up with some smack - she promises to do anything they want. But before Mr Big has time to get his rocks off Coffy pulls a sawn-off shotgun from her macramé purse and blows his no good fucking head off. It's pretty amazing, not quite MANIAC (or even that girl getting her brains blown out in THE BEYOND) amazing, but still pretty amazing. Then she ODs the other dealer before going on her merry way. What a badass.

After her friend and ex-lover - a nice guy cop named Carter (Elliott) - suffers brain damage at the hands of some home invaders (organized by his corrupt cop brethren), Coffy goes ballistic and takes out all manner of scum from the lowliest pusher to mobsters and even a corrupt politician. In order to do this she passes herself off as a Jamaican hooker named Mystique so that she can get up close and personal with her victims before blowing them away. Apart from her mastery of seduction Coffy's biggest asset is her ability to manipulate any situation in her favor, no matter how dire things seem. Getting caught red-handed trying to assassinate mob boss Vitroni (Arbus) is no problem as she smoothly twists the situation around and lays all the blame on pimp daddy King George (DoQui).

There are so many great scenes in this film and the opening shotgun blast to the face is just the beginning. Watch as Coffy gets into a catfight with a roomful of hookers, a fight which ends up tearing a lot of clothing and exposing a lot of boob, and gets bloody thanks to a couple of cleverly concealed razorblades. Watch as Sid Haig's sadistic thug Omar takes King George for a ride around the block, trailing from the back of the car by a rope and leaving a bloodied and mangled corpse by the journey's end. And of course there's the scene where Coffy grills a lesbian junkie just as her 'old man' Harriet walks in the door.

And then there are the characters themselves. There's Coffy of course, but then there's the corrupt congressman Brunswick (Bradshaw), the fabulously dressed pimp King George, violent thug Omar (played with relish by Sid Haig) and a host of other colorful characters. Another notable inclusion is Allan Arbus who plays mobster Arturo Vitroni. I had fond childhood memories of Arbus' portrayal of the kindly psychiatrist Sidney Freedman in about a dozen episodes of M*A*S*H, fond memories which were swiftly shattered as soon as he told Pam Grier to get on her knees, called her a nigger and then spat in her face. Good times.
I could go on about COFFY all day but I don't want to spoil too much. If you take anything away from this review I hope it's the notion that COFFY is fucking rad and you should go watch it now. Because it is and you should.

BLACK MAMA, WHITE MAMA (1973) Review

Directed by: Eddie Romero
Written by: H.R. Christian, Joe Viola, Jonathan Demme
Starring: Pam Grier, Margaret Markov, Sid Haig, Lynn Borden, Zaldy Zshornack, Eddie Garcia, Vic Diaz

"CHICKS IN CHAINS... ON THE LAM FROM A PRISON HELL - MANACLED TOGETHER BY HATE AND THE IDEAS A WOMAN GETS AFTER 1000 NIGHTS WITHOUT A MAN"

This week at Kvlt Kino it's International Pam Grier Week, and we will be celebrating the queen of blaxploitation all week long. No, it's not an official thing but I figure that if we can have ridiculous events like International Talk Like A Pirate Day or National Gazpacho Day (yes that's a real thing) then surely somebody as iconic and badass as Pam Grier deserves a made-up holiday too. Plus I'm totally in the mood to watch a metric fuck-tonne of movies this week and there's no reason that they shouldn't all star the foxy chocolate queen. So without further ado let's kick off International Pam Grier Week with Eddie Romero's Women in Prison classic BLACK MAMA, WHITE MAMA.

BLACK MAMA, WHITE MAMA you may be surprised to know, is about a black woman and a white woman. Amazing I know. There are other women in the film of course but they really aren't that important - well except for the lengthy shower scene, in that case they are all important.
Our two leading ladies are Karen (Markov) and Lee (Grier) - I'll let you figure out which is Black Mama and which is White Mama. Karen is a revolutionary and Lee is a prostitute and they have both landed in a women's prison somewhere on a jungle-festooned island which is never named but is clearly the Philippines. The prison is run by lesbian Matron Densmore (Borden), a woman who likes to bed the more attractive prisoners and even has her own little hidey-hole where she can peek into the showers while she masturbates. The accompanying shower scene (essential for any WIP movie) runs for a decent 5 minutes and there are wet boobs all over the place. It's pretty awesome.

Lee rejects Densmore's advances but Karen is more than happy to enjoy the extra privileges that come with being the Matron's plaything and her black counterpart isn't impressed when she realizes the rest of the girls have to pick up the slack. Lee and Karen argue and fight, ending up with them spending a day in 'the oven'; a steel box situated out under the blistering sun. After being pulled out of the oven half naked and slick with sweat the two are told that they are being transferred so that they can be interrogated because they both have useful information that the police are after. During transport Karen's rebel friends attack and the two women escape, which is good. What's not so good however is the fact that they are handcuffed together. Lee and Karen both have different goals and can't agree on where to go or what to do. Karen wants to meet up with her revolutionary boyfriend Ernesto (Zshornack) but as Lee puts it "Some jive-ass revolution don't mean shit to me!" She'd much rather escape the island with the 40k she stole from drug lord Vic (Diaz).

By now Karen and Lee are running not only from the cops but also a group of bounty-hunters lead by flamboyant womanising cowboy type Ruben (played brilliantly by Sid Haig) and drug baron Vic's gang. The rebels are also on their trail as they try to catch up to Karen so they can complete a deal for some weapons.
The two women traverse the island dodging roadblocks, stealing food, beating up nuns and stealing their clothes and other fun stuff like that, all the while with bloodthirsty gangsters and bounty hunters hot on their trail. The pacing the great with plenty of action and barely a dull moment and director Romero certainly knows how to please an exploitation-hungry audience. It seems that if there isn't gunshots or explosions happening somewhere on screen then there's naked ladies traipsing around, having threesomes with Sid Haig or licking crime lord Vic's greasy, hairy body. And the finale is appropriately climactic with the separate factions finally colliding and having a final gun battle. BLACK MAMA, WHITE MAMA isn't Grier's best movie by a long shot but it is one hell of an entertaining piece of exploitation gold.

Kvlt News: AMERICAN GUINEA PIG

Ever wish there were more plotless torture films with impressive special effects out there? Or more films with sickly, sore-covered sewer-dwelling mermaids oozing pus? Yes? Well then rejoice because the notorious Japanese splatter series that made Charlie Sheen shit his pants and call the FBI looks set to receive an American reboot. According to Fangoria Stephen Biro (whose Unearthed Films released the GUINEA PIG series on dvd in the US) has plans to produce an American series.

According to Biro "Many have tried to copy them, but few have approached their very grim core. Unearthed Films is bringing the white-hot tip of unrelenting gore, unparalleled atrocities and unmerciful slaughter back into the mind's eye of all the horror fans who dared to see what the originals were truly about"

Well that's certainly some pretty big talk there, but can Biro and his team really live up to it? I guess we'll just have to wait until the first entry in the new franchise; BOUQUET OF GUTS AND GORE is released. BOUQUET is set to be directed by Stephen Biro with Marcus Koch (CIRCUS OF THE DEAD) creating the makeup FX and Jim VanBebber (THE MANSON FAMILY) serving as cinematographer
Stay tuned for more on the American series and find out if it really does live up to its notorious predecessors.

AMERICAN GUINEA PIG Facebook Page.

DEADBALL (2011) Review

Directed by: Yudai Yamaguchi
Written by: Keita Tokaji, Yudai Yamaguchi
Starring: Tak Sakaguchi, Mari Hoshino, Miho Ninagawa, Takamasa Suga, Mickey Curtis

"GRAB YOUR BAT, IT'S TIME TO PLAY BALL!"

I'm just gonna come out and say it; DEADBALL fucking rocks. I have a feeling I already reviewed it on one of my other blogs but fuck it, I'm going to do it again because I just watched the movie for the third or fourth time and it's still as brilliant as it was the first time around.
Back in 2003 director Yudai Yamaguchi unleashed his crazy comedy / action / zombie / musical / baseball film BATTLEFIELD BASEBALL which starred Tak Sakaguchi as a highschool student recruited by the baseball team because of his incredible pitching talent. It was a completely absurd film that peppered musical numbers throughout a violent no-rules baseball game played between two rival teams. It was crazy and entertaining as fuck.

DEADBALL is somewhat of a reimagining of the previous film, an entirely fresh take on the same premise which once again stars Tak Sakaguchi and ditches the highschool location with a more appropriate prison setting. It also cranks everything up to 11. This movie is completely batshit insane, in a way that only the Japanese could create. Tak Sakaguchi plays Jubei, a 17-year old (never mind the fact that Sakaguchi himself was 36 at the time of filming) baseball prodigy whose incredible pitching arm ends up accidentally killing his own father. After swearing off baseball Jubei becomes a vigilante and is eventually captured and imprisoned in the Pterodactyl Juvenile Reformatory. The prison is run by iron-fisted Nazi bitch Ishihara (Ninagawa) and before long Jubei discovers that his brother was previously imprisoned in the same reformatory but died mysteriously. Ishihara recruits Jubei to play for the prison baseball team and he and his teammates find themselves in a deadly no-rules match run by Ishihara to entertain and impress her Nazi friends.

DEADBALL manages to cram in so much ridiculousness that it will have you rolling around with laughter and shaking your head in disbelief in equal measures. Want to see elbow-deep rectal cavity searches? You got it. Vomit eating? That too. Sakaguchi defeating a German-trained martial arts expert with nothing but a salt-shaker? Yep that's in here too, along with a smorgasbord of Looney Tunes-style violence, a sexy but deadly all-female baseball team, testicle removal and a Nazi baseball cyborg cum killing machine. And if that's not enough don't worry because there's plenty more over-the-top craziness, in fact if I wanted to list all of it this review would take half the day to finish.

Tak Sakaguchi is one cool motherfucker, like totally ice cool. He has this Clint Eastwood vibe going on with his poncho and spurs, and he has the badass ability to pull a lit cigarette from off-camera at any time he wants. The climax of the film is the showdown between the Pterodactyl Gauntlets and the St Black Dahlia baseball teams. it's a game with an unconventional scoring system which rewards spectacular kills rather than runs. The array of baseball-related weaponry ranges from spiked bats to grenade balls and fibre-wire balls, all of which batter, slice and blow apart the players left right and centre. The biggest criticism I have about DEADBALL is the overuse of CGI especially when it comes to blood and explosions, although in a way it kind of works within the confines of the comic book (or manga I guess) type violence. If you've seen and enjoyed anything from Sushi Typhoon then you need to check this out right now because it's easily their best offering so far.